The First Grade Teacher

I need to start t his posting with an explanation of some teaching bashing I have done in this blog. First, I am one hundred percent behind my union. But I am also one hundred percent for the students who are affected by incompetent, slip through the cracks, unsafe to be near in a classroom teacher. Mrs Ass Kisser is not a safety concern, but a phony. I will acknowledge that she does know the curriculum, but she is lazy, and whitewashes what is to be seen. As long as that bulletin board looks pretty that is all that matters.

Which brings me to Mr First Grade. Oh I just love coming up with these pet names. But I can’t take credit for this pet name. Credit is due a colleague of mine who dubbed him “the world’s oldest first grader.” For the purposes of this blog Mr First Grade will henceforth be known as Mr FG.

Watching Mr FG teach today reminded me of when I was little and me and my friends played teacher. I mean he would have fit right in with how we played except that we spoke better English. His English is a cross between the Frito Bandito, Don Corleone, and my Grandma Celia with her Polish accent. Is it any wonder the kids have never learned thing one in the years he has been my school?

His suits are never tailored as if he was an eight year old wearing daddy’s clothes to work. He has no classroom management, if left alone in a room of six year olds they are soon running amok. When paired with another teacher he never does the teaching and lets the other teacher do all the work, which I guess is good thing if you think about it. He has already been removed from one school and dumped with us. How does he do it? He must be extorting someone.

And the thing is he doesn’t see it at all. He thinks he is Charlie Moore! He makes Mrs Krabappel look like teacher of the year!

It has been proven that any student he has had is at least a year behind students from other classes in the same grade. How does this happen? Why does it happen? In fact rumor has it that he has been terminated from another big city school district for incompetence. There has to be some truth to that. I think there is a lot of truth to that.