A Pearson Future?

We here at SBSB are still analyzing the "victory" and smackdown we as teachers scored over
Governor Andy. Stay tuned on a post on how Assemblyman David Buchwald fibbed to a packed cafeteria of parents, teachers, and administrators in Harrison High School back in February and ideas on hide your address from the state ed department.

One thing The Crack Team has had on it's mind is this special "teacher evaluator" that is part of the new law. Yes, Governor Andy had wanted it to be 35 percent of a teacher's evaluation yet it was punted to the board of regents for final say.

Trial balloons have been floated that these special, independent evaluators can be teachers from the same school who are highly effective, principals from other school within the district or from neighboring districts or even retired principals. No one knows for sure and no one knows where the money will come from for such an endeavor.

One idea The Crack Team has been kicking around (Don't forget, The Crack Team can peer into the future) is that these so called evaluators were put into the bill not because Governor Andy does not trust local administrators but rather to line the pockets of campaign contributors who will be able to make big bucks (Because isn't that what it is really all  about??) from this legislation.

Think about it.Who stands to profit the most from having outside, independent evaluators come in to classroom and evaluate the teachers?

**Cough cough** Pearson? **Cough cough**

So The Crack Team got to thinking and wondered what would it be like if Pearson truly, and quite possibly, gets involved in the future?

We decided to convene a meeting of the social sciences committee of The Crack Team. Actually, it was just a bunch of us eating Chinese food and Carvel milk shakes, but that is neither here nor there. The committee wanted to see how Pearson would go about recruiting evaluators and what type of people would it employ. After the last spare rib and fortune cookie we came up with a working hypothesis.

The committee placed a faux ad on Craigslist which read;

Teacher Evaluators Needed (Midtown)

Pearson PLC is looking to hire new teacher evaluators starting in September 2015. The details of these evaluators is still being worked out in Albany but if you are looking to for part time or full time work this is the place for you!

Qualifications:

A high school diploma
A working knowledge of English
A bubbly personality
The ability to follow directions
The ability to make checks in boxes
The ability to use a pencil
A working command of English
The willingness to travel throughout the 5 boroughs
The ability to read a subway map 

A background in education is not needed. You will be trained for 5 hours in identifying good pedagogy.

 

What would happen next? Believe it or not The Crack Team got some responses! Seriously, we can not make this sh** up! Let's read together (Names, phone numbers, and email addresses have been changed). 

Henry Blake<35gdte633xxxxxx44333xxxxxx@reply.craigslist.org>	Apr 6 (1 day ago)
to abcdef-1234567.

Hello my name is Henry Blake I'm an experienced school auditor and I'm interested in helping you out if there is still availability. Please feel free to email me back or you can call or text me at 347-555-1212...thanks!

and....

Steve Urkel @reply.craigslist.org>	Apr 6 (1 day ago)
to abcdef-1234567.

Hi, my name is Steve Urkel, i would love to be an evaluator, i am a college grad, my number is 900-555-1212.

and.....

Alfalfa Switzer <1eaa94d470c033aba3d5069a62c8a294@reply.craigslist.org>	5:17 PM (6 hours ago)
to abcdef-1234567.

Alfalfa Switzer

888 888-8888

I am a youth baseball coach and a neighborhood cleaner. I also bike ride. I am a 55 year old divorced man who recently counted traffic for an engineer hired by the Dept. of Transportation.

This stuff just can't be made up. Don't be surprised if make believe becomes reality. 

Education is turning into McDonald's.