Judge Smails Tells Danny Noonan He Is Not College Ready

In the 1980 hit comedy, "Caddyshack" (Which I have watch hundreds of times), caddy extraordinaire Danny Noonan attempts to curry favor with Judge Smails to win Bushwood's caddy scholarship. This coming on the heels of the untimely death of Carl Lipbaum, the original winner who suddenly died of a severe anxiety attack while at summer school.

While transversing the first fairway Danny, who was caddying for Judge Smails lamented that he will not be able to afford to go to law school after college but his family will be unable to afford it. Judge Smails in a bad mood due to the noise coming from Al Czervik's foursome, tells Danny that the "world needs ditch diggers too." After this comment Judge Smails niece, Lacy Underall from Manhattan, is mean and mocks him.

I bring this up for I am disturbed about a quote from His Commissionership, John King Ph.D, OEO, OC, Esq., KC, OB-GYN in a New York Times article, from this past Monday, about the forums he is hosting across the state;

“The reason that 45 states, the District of Columbia and Department of Defense schools have all come together around the Common Core is the clear need to ensure that all of our students graduate from high school ready for college and career success,” he said. 

I am confused. Danny Noonan seems to be not only college ready, but career ready as well. He works hard at the club, puts his money away, save for the odd Coke-Cola and cheeseburger, and knows he wants to be a lawyer with a practice in noise litigation. Yet with all his hard work, his father's job at the lumber yard, he might not be able to afford to go to college.

On the the other hand, Judge Smails ne'er do well nephew Spalding, is lazy, stupid, eats his own boogers, can't make up his mind what he wants for lunch, drinks alcohol with cigarettes in the glass, and mistakes a Baby Ruth bar for doody, apparently will be able to go to college, probably any college he wants to. What is wrong with this picture?

Because even though this film took place in 1980 and is fictional, it still emanates today.

College is becoming more and more unaffordable by the day. An Ivy League school could cost up to $60K a year. Private colleges almost as much. Public schools, while far cheaper, are getting more and more expensive, compared to when I went.

So if we get all our children "college ready," what then happens when they or their families can't afford college and/or go into massive debt to afford it? Or does His Commissionership, John King Ph.D, OEO, OC, Esq., KC, OB-GYN and his ilk mean to send all our students, other than the top tier (be that academically or their social strata) to community college?

Career ready? What does that mean? When my son was 5 he wanted to be an ice cream man when he grew up. Now at 12 he wants to play Major League Baseball. Does he need school (I am being sarcastic)?

But what about the lack of jobs that we see here in the United States today? Their either extremely low paying or extremely high paying, no in between. Is His Commissionership, John King Ph.D, OEO, OC, Esq., KC, OB-GYN and his ilk training our children to be greeters at Wal-Mart?

A very bright educator and I were having a conversation about the Common Core last week. She told me that we need the Common Core so we can compete with India. She bought into the propaganda.

In India 68.7% live on less than $2 a day. So I guess to compete against India, we need 70% in the United States to make less than that?

India has 1.2 billion people, 74% literacy rate. Just because so many call centers are opening up in India doesn't mean they are kicking our butts.

Must we compete against China and it's 1.3 billion people? Most of the people there are making less than $10 a day. My wife has been to China many times for business. The factories there house, feed, and employ the workers who make those $600 handbags for $2.99.

The jobs are going overseas because it is cheaper and their is less, much less government oversight. What must change in this country is the greed from the top. Just look at what is happening to Boeing in Washington State.

I'm going to sum up how much of a farce this career and college readiness mantra is.

Growing up I had a friend that was at the top of our high school graduating class and went to the University of Chicago. Me, I was way at the bottom of class and went to WCC out of high school. He was very, very book smart. Once when he was trying to show off how smart he believed he was I told him something.

"Hank, let's try an experiment. Let's have someone drop us off in the middle of the woods separately, no supplies, no nothing. Within 24 hours you will be dead and I will be lounging about in front of a TV."

That can't be  taught in school. That transforms so much through life. That I learned at a YMCA sleep away camp in Connecticut, not in school.