Enabling Dear Principal John Deacon

Merriam-Webster online dictionary defines an enabler thusly:

one that enables another to achieve an end ; especially : one who enables another to persist in self-destructive behavior (as substance abuse) by providing excuses or by making it possible to avoid the consequences of such behavior

Now, this does not mean that Dear Principal John Deacon is a substance abuser. Besides, Dr Hans von Schlaggel from Vienna the guest columnist on April 8 has already diagnosed Dear Principal John Deacon with suffering from malignant narcissism. So we do have an official diagnosis. But someone who suffers from malignant narcissism must be confronted, have an intervention, must not be enabled. And this is where BFF Yolanda Torres comes in.

Think about it. How can Dear Principal John Deacon overcome this diagnosis as long as BFF Yolanda Torres continues to enable such self-destructive behavior from Dear Principal John Deacon? BFF Yolanda Torres, in the role of the co-dependent spouse might think she is helping her BFF Dear Principal John Deacon. This usually includes making excuses, covering up, looking the other way at self-destructive or dysfunctional behavior Dear Principal John Deacon exudes. But this is not helpful. It only perpetuates such behavoir from Dear Principal John Deacon.

Oh, oh. Wait. Dr Hans von Schlaggel just walked in, and seems to have a beer stein, a very large one at that, in his hand. He is signaling he wishes to add something to the discussion.

Guten Abend meine Freunde! I am good. I have been drinking a lot of Deutsch Bier. Bönnsch. No Budweiser for me. Budweiser tastes like Pferde-Urin. So quickly, I explain what what the enabling, co-dependent does. In this case BFF Yolanda Torres. Then I finish and I go back to be with the hübsche Frauen.

Individuals who enable others have weak boundaries, low self-esteem, and have difficulty being assertive when they communicate with others. Feeling needed as an enabler is not worth the long term ramifications created by the enabling. The person being enabled will have some difficult short term consequences. And now you see why.

Now I go back to the Brauhaus. Gute Nacht und süße Träume!