SOUTH BRONX SCHOOL: BREAKING!!! Possible New ATR Agreement and News You Should Know!

Saturday, December 17, 2016

BREAKING!!! Possible New ATR Agreement and News You Should Know!

Let's get something out of the way. Your CAR is safe. The number of sick/personal days is safe. They are not being traded in for FLMA. There is no need to worry. 

Someone, David Irons, the author of the "Vote No on the UFT Contract" Facebook page  has started this rumor which Chaz was quickly able to disembowel.

Why would David start such a rumor? Perhaps someone within the DOE shared this with him? Maybe he was on the bowl in the UFT executive washroom and heard this? Who knows? What David fails to realize is it takes two to tango, and this could have  very well been an opening salvo from the DOE which the UFT promptly shut down. Yes, the UFT (if this offer was made) can be more transparent. This lack of transparency unfortunately allows the likes of David Irons to operate unfettered.

One must consider the source as well. David operates his Facebook page anonymously with zero accountability. We call on David to share post haste with all his readers who he is, what he stands for, and more importantly, who he stands with. 

What David doesn't share readily is that he suckles at the teat of the UFT Solidarity trough. Through UFT Solidarity David has learned the art fear and misrepresentation. David also has major issues (Seriously, MAJOR ISSUES!) with the UFT and needs to psychologically project (Oooh, who do we know that is that way??) with others.

But The Crack Team is surprised that David has only scrapped the very tip of what the UFT is currently negotiating currently. As we know the UFT is in negotiations with the NYCDOE concerning evaluations and ATR's. We here at SBSB wish to share with David Irons what The Crack Team has been able to learn from multiple sources as to the future of the ATR pool.

Starting in September 2017 each ATR...

Required to download an app onto their smart phone to be tracked.

Required to sign a agreement that they are worthless and weak.

Sign a waiver releasing the DOE from assigning bathroom keys. 

Must wear an obedience device like Captain Kirk (going shirtless is optional for male ATR's) did in "The Gamesters of Triskelion" .

Can not park their cars within one quarter mile of any NYCDOE school in which they're assigned.

Must eat lunch no later than 10:35 AM and must only eat food served in the cafeteria.

On days that school is not in session must show up and wait outside until given permission to leave.

Must leave home no later than 5 AM if the ATR takes public transportation.

Will not be required to sign in at the school safety desk. This will be replaced with a retina scan.

Must address all teachers with less than three years experience as either sir or ma'am.

When addressing all teachers with less than three years experience eye contact is forbidden. 

Must walk at least three paces behind any teacher with less than three years experience. 

Must give up their seat in any and all places where teachers congregate to teachers with less than three years experience. 

Must appear for mandatory interviews in which the ATR will be notified 15 minutes beforehand to attend.

And last but not least, must sign away their soul to the new NYCDOE ATR ombudsman which upon death will prevent the NYCDOE from a fulfilling afterlife but rather be rotated between Hell, Purgatory, and Heaven (There is one upside to this. Jews do not have concept of Hell or Purgatory so get ready for an influx of ATR's converting to Judaism).

Surprised David Irons has not found out about this possible ATR news. Surely, he would have reported this as he did his news about the CAR.



5 comments:

Anonymous said...

I love the parts about properly respecting teachers with fewer than three years experience.

Abigail Shure

Anonymous said...

I don't think Chaz disembowled the rumor. His post has actually increased its vitality. I don't know if this rumor is true or false, there nothing we can do about it anyway. The Solidarity comment shows you can hold a grudge longer than anyone I've ever known and you're blogs show a mean spirited dude who really doesn't like Christians. Happy Chanukah to you and your family.

Pete Zucker said...

There's no grudge. Stating fact. I don't need to see sun rise in the East to know it has risen in the East.

But thanks for the laughs. I appreciate it.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous 11:06 I take offense at your saying that Peter doesn't like Christians. You are the one being mean spirited. Actually you are the one who is racist.

Pete Zucker said...

Dear Mr Hiding Behind the Veil of Anonymity @11:06:

WTF? I hate Christians? It took me time to figure out why you wrote that. Don't you have any higher order thinking skills that might enable you to identify snarkiness?