SOUTH BRONX SCHOOL: April 2023

Sunday, April 16, 2023

Springtime for Mulgrew: Mike Mulgrew Stars in Mulgrewcare Version of The Producers

 Many don't know that Mike Mulgrew is an avid theater fan. And still many are unaware that Mulgrew leads a theater company known as "Mulgrew & Company." In fact, Mulgrew must always have the lead part. It's written into his contract. This has caused some issues when the theater company put on "The
Miracle Worker."

Anyhoo, the theater company is now in rehearsals of their version of "The Producers." But for some curious reason, instead of Mulgrew playing Max Bialystock, the character's name is actually Mike Mulgrew. And instead of a play about a conman ripping off little old ladies for a musical, it's now a musical about a conman ripping off little old ladies and little old men. 

Members of The Crack Team snuck into some of the rehearsals without audio but took copious notes of what they witnessed and we here at SBSB are sharing for the first time.

The Overture:

New York City was having trouble, what a sad, sad story 

Needed a man to save a lot of money 

Where, Oh where was he? 

Where could that man be? 

We looked around and then we found 

The man for Mayor Adams. And now it's..

Springtime for Mulgrew and Tom Murphy

Adams is happy and and won't say nay

We're marching to retirees to a faster death

Look out, there goes master health

Springtime for Mulgrew and the MLC

Winter for retirees and and in service

Springtime for Mulgrew and the MLC

Come on, New Yorkers, go into your dance

Don't be stupid, be a smarty, come and join the Unity party

Scene in Mulgrew's Office:

Don't you see, darling Bloom, glorious Bloom? It's so simple. STEP ONE: We claim  that the city is $600 million  in the hole and don't tell any of the rank and file about it.. STEP TWO: I tell lots of little old ladies, little old men, all retirees teachers, DC 37, the MLC, all the unions mayors . STEP THREE: You go back to work on the books, two of them - one for the retirees, one for us. You can do it, Bloom; you're a wizard! STEP FOUR: We set up with Aetna for Medicare Advantage plan. STEP FIVE, We act like we care, like we really believe the crap we're laying on the retirees and in- service members.And before you can say STEP SIX we watch more retirees drop dead and/or get denied and save the city big bucks !!! STEP SEVEN: We take our million bucks in kickbacks from Aetna and fly to *Rio!*

Tom Murphy (As Leo Bloom): My blanket! My blue blanket! Give me my blue blanket!

Wednesday, April 12, 2023

A Tribute to Kings

 This is a repost. Figured since I'm on a roll with concert reviews why not revisit this concert? And I want to blog and still recovering from surgery on wrist and elbow and typing is a PIA. I'm in world of repeats.

Back on September 26, 2021 I was able to see live music for the first time in almost 18 months. Who did I see? I saw Primus. It was my first time ever seeing them.  Why did I go? Because they were to play Rush's 1977 album, "A Farewell to Kings" in its entirety. The show was at the Oakdale Theater in Wallingford, CT where they were supposed to play in July of 2020. But due to the COVID craziness everything was postponed. 

But being there is no more Rush ever again (Unless Geddy and Alex can recruit Ringo Dave Grohl to take over the drums or maybe even Mike Portnoy) I need to get a Rush fix whenever possible. Les Claypool took care of it for a night. By the way, I really enjoyed the show and I like Primus.

So I am embedding the the first three songs of AFTK. The title track, Closer to the Heart, and Xanadu. Enjoy. 

Update 4/12/23: Next up for me:  Daryl Hall, Capitol Theater in Port Chester 6/7/23

 

 

 

 


Monday, April 10, 2023

Mike Mulgrew Pulls a Dwight Schrute

 Sometime ago The Crack Team secretly embedded a microphone on Mike Mulgrew to get a first hand account of healthcare negotiations, meetings with members, and other inanity. This microphone was with Mulgrew for over a year. Unfortunately, members of The Crack Team were unable to upload the original recording due to a technical glitch. But when one door closes another door opens. Frank of The Crack Team had the foresight to transcribe the year long audio and tonight, for the first time anywhere, SBSB takes it's readers deep into Mike Mulgrew's plan to subvert our healthcare. 

Mayor Adams: There’s a decision that needs to be made, and I’m having an unbelievably a busy day. So I’m going to let you pick a health care plan for our NYC retirees and then explain it to the retirees

Mike Mulgrew: Yes. I can do it. I’m your man..

Mike Mulgrew: OK, first, let’s go over some parameters. How teachers can I fire?

Mayor Adams: Ah, none. You’re picking a health care plan.

Mayor Adams: If Mulgrew fails, then that is strike two, and good for me for, ah, for giving him a second chance. And if he succeeds, then, you know, no one will be prouder than I am. I groomed him. I made him what he is today. Unless he fails, and we’ve talked about that already.

Mike Mulgrew: What did I do? I did my job. I slashed benefits to the bone. I saved the city money. Was I too harsh? Maybe. I don’t believe in coddling people.

Mike Mulgrew: In the wild, there is no health care. In the wild, health care is, “Ow, I hurt my leg. I can’t run. A lion eats me and I’m dead.” Well, I’m not dead. I’m the lion. You’re dead.

Female UFT Officer: OK. Mike. Are you really in charge of picking the health care plan?

Mike Mulgrew: Yes. And my decision in final.

Female UFT Officer: This is a ridiculously awful plan. Because you cut everything.

Mike Mulgrew: Aww, times are tough. Deal with it.

Female UFT Officer: You cut more than you had to, didn’t you?

Mike Mulgrew: Sure.

Female UFT Officer: Well, why did you do that? You work for the DOE as well, don’t you want good insurance?

Mike Mulgrew: Don’t need it. Never been sick. Perfect immune system.

AT A TOWN HALL MEETING OVER ZOOM IN 2022.....

Mike Mulgrew: OK, everyone. Gather round. It has been brought to my attention that some of you are unhappy with my plan. So what I’d like you to do is to open chat windows and type down any diseases you have that you might want covered and I’ll see what I can do.

Two Teachers Collaborating during town hall meeting...

Teacher 1: So, let’s say my teeth turn to liquid and then, they drip down the back of my throat. What would you call that?

Teacher 2: I thought you said you were inventing diseases? That’s spontaneous dental hydroplosion.

Mike Mulgrew: Uh, someone forged, uh, medical information and that is a felony. Uh, leprosy? Flesh eating bacteria. Hot-dog fingers. Government-created killer nanorobot infection. I’ll have to interview each and every one of you until the perpetrator makes him or herself known. And until that time, there will be no health care coverage for any one!

The problem, is that people who are really suffering from a medical condition won’t receive the care they need, because someone in this office is coming up with all this ridiculous stuff. [reads off of paper] “Count Choculitis”

At a town hall meeting several weeks later....

Mike Mulgrew: I’m now going to read out loud your submitted medical conditions. When you hear yours read, please raise your hand to indicate that it is real. If you do not raise your hand, it will not be covered. Number one: Inverted penis.

Mike Mulgrew: OK, great. Dermatitis. Thank you. I’ll make sure that’s covered. OK, now. Who wrote this, hysterical one? Anal fissures?

Teacher from Staten Island: That’s a real thing.

Mike Mulgrew: Yeah, but no one here has it.

Teacher from Staten Island: Someone has it.

That's all for now. We can see all the hard work that Mulgrew has put in.

Sunday, April 9, 2023

Pray Retirees Illnesses and Maladies Away

With all this talk of Mulgrewcare going on, the alternatives were never discussed. The Crack Team has come across information that Mike Mulgrew had seriously considered, in concert with Mayor Adams, to put all retirees on a Christian Science health care plan.

The plan known as "Pray it Away" would have cut out all hospitals, doctors, etc... The only cost to the city would be: buying each retired member "Science and Health," the monthly "Christian Science Bible Lesson" magazine, and a Bible. From what The Crack Team has heard Adams was against this but Mulgrew kept on pushing it.

We got a copy of Mulgrew's proposal and it is being published here for the first time ever.

"Pray it Away"

A  Healthcare Proposal

By UFT Presidenté Mike Mulgrew

As the cost of healthcare continues to rise in the United States, more and more cities are exploring alternative healthcare plans to provide for their residents, particularly retirees. One such alternative is the Christian Science healthcare plan, which has proven effective in providing quality healthcare to those who follow this faith tradition. In this essay, I will argue that the city of New York should adopt a Christian Science healthcare plan for retirees, citing how it would save money.

Christian Science healthcare is a faith-based healthcare system that provides spiritual healing to its members. It is based on the teachings of Mary Baker Eddy, who founded the Christian Science Church in the late 19th century. Christian Science that emphasizes the power of prayer and spiritual healing. Members of the Christian Science Church believe that healing can be achieved through the power of God, and that the mind and body are connected. Through prayer and spiritual practice, they seek to heal illness and injury.

One of the benefits of Christian Science healthcare is that it is cost-effective. Members of the Christian Science Church do not rely on traditional medical treatments, such as medication or surgery, and therefore, do not incur the same costs. Instead, they rely on prayer and spiritual healing to treat illness and injury. This can result in significant cost savings for both individuals and healthcare providers.

For the city of New York, adopting a Christian Science healthcare plan for retirees could result in significant cost savings. Retirees are one of the largest groups of healthcare consumers in the United States, and their healthcare needs can be complex and costly. By offering a Christian Science healthcare plan as an alternative to traditional healthcare plans, the city could reduce the cost of healthcare for retirees and ultimately save money.

In addition to cost savings, a Christian Science healthcare plan could also offer other benefits for retirees. Many retirees struggle with chronic health conditions, such as diabetes, heart disease, and arthritis. These conditions require ongoing medical treatment and can be costly to manage. Christian Science healthcare offers an alternative approach to managing chronic health conditions that focuses on spiritual healing and prayer. This could be an attractive option for retirees who are looking for a different approach to managing their health.

Another benefit of a Christian Science healthcare plan is that it could offer retirees a sense of community and support. Members of the Christian Science Church often come together to pray for healing and offer support to one another. This sense of community could be particularly valuable for retirees, who may be experiencing feelings of isolation or loneliness.

Critics of Christian Science healthcare argue that it is not a substitute for traditional medical care and that it can be dangerous to rely solely on prayer and spiritual healing to treat illness and injury. But we don't care. Pray it away is what can and will work. All the MLC needs to do is just tithe the Christian Science church now and again

In conclusion, the city of New York should adopt a Christian Science healthcare plan for retirees. This plan could result in significant cost savings for the city and offer retirees an alternative approach to managing their health. By offering a Christian Science healthcare plan, the city could also provide retirees with a sense of community and support, which could be valuable for those who may be experiencing feelings of isolation or loneliness. Adopting a Christian Science healthcare plan for retirees could be a cost-effective and beneficial option for the city of New York.

Saturday, April 8, 2023

Why The UFT is Weak by Guest Blogger Mr Mackey

 I had surgery on my left wrist and elbow yesterday so writing big long blog posts are not easy right now.

However, I turned to OpenAI to write an essay in the voice of Mr Mackey from South Park. The bot pretty much nails it. 

Mmmkay, let's talk about the United Federation of Teachers (UFT) and why some people think it's a weak union. As a school counselor, I've seen the impact of the UFT's actions on our teachers and students, so I have some thoughts on the matter.

First of all, the UFT has been criticized for being too cozy with the political establishment. They've been known to support Democratic Party politicians, and some of their own union leaders have gone on to hold political office themselves. This relationship with politicians can be a double-edged sword for the union. On one hand, it gives them access to people who can make decisions that affect teachers and students. On the other hand, it can make them look like they're more interested in politics than in advocating for their members.

Another issue with the UFT is that it's not very militant. They don't seem to be willing to take bold actions, like strikes, to achieve their goals. This can be frustrating for teachers who want to see more aggressive action from their union. However, it's important to remember that public employee strikes are illegal in New York State. So, the UFT is limited in what they can do to pressure the city and state to give them what they want.

Additionally, the UFT's bargaining position is weakened by the fact that New York City has a large pool of unemployed teachers who can be used as replacement workers in the event of a strike. This means that the UFT doesn't have as much leverage as they would in a situation where there was a shortage of teachers. It's hard to negotiate for better working conditions and pay when the city knows they can replace teachers who strike.

The UFT has also been criticized for failing to build strong alliances with other unions and community organizations. It's important for unions to work together and with other groups that share their goals. When you have a broad-based coalition, you're more likely to achieve your goals. The UFT has not been able to build these kinds of alliances, and it's left them vulnerable to attacks from management and politicians.

Another issue is that the UFT is divided along racial and ethnic lines. The majority of UFT members are white, while the majority of New York City public school students are people of color. This has led to tensions within the union over issues such as school funding, teacher evaluation, and school discipline. The UFT has not been able to effectively address these issues and has been criticized for not doing enough to support its members of color.

So, what can the UFT do to become a stronger union? First, they need to focus more on organizing and building power from the ground up. They should be working to mobilize their members and create a more active and engaged membership. This could include things like more regular union meetings and events, more opportunities for members to get involved in decision-making, and more direct action.

The UFT also needs to build stronger alliances with other unions and community organizations. They should be working to identify common goals and find ways to work together. For example, the UFT could partner with other unions to advocate for better working conditions and pay for all public employees. They could also work with community groups to advocate for more funding for public schools.

Another way the UFT can become stronger is by addressing the divisions within the union. They need to be more proactive in supporting their members of color and addressing the issues that affect them. This could include things like training for teachers on cultural competency and implicit bias, and advocating for more resources for schools with high numbers of students of color.

Overall, the UFT has a lot of work to do if they want to become a stronger union. They need to be more militant and willing to take bold action to achieve their goals.