SOUTH BRONX SCHOOL: Landru Pervades PS 154 in the Bronx

Saturday, April 20, 2013

Landru Pervades PS 154 in the Bronx

The clarion call came from far and wide. A meeting there was to be. For some, it was a rally, for others it was a march of doom. But this entity that controls PS 154, Landru (OK, I know, another Star Trek reference, but it is so appropriate. For those that don't sleep in their parents basement, click here to learn more), was determined to be heard and and be heard it must.

All those who gathered for the meeting sat down amongst the self perceived greatness and perfection of Landru as it served ice cold, chilly coolattas to those awaiting its knowledge. A hush fell upon those assembled as Landru began to speak.

"There is not a discipline problem at PS 154," Landru bellowed to the mass of the beaten, the downtrodden, the blissfully ignorant. Besides, Landru shared with everyone, "We have a plan in place as we speak." The downtrodden, the beaten, those who are "not of the body" snickered and laugh.The general feeling is that these types must be "absorbed."

A plan? There is a plan at PS 154 for discipline? The Crack Team here at SBSB went into investigative mode and indeed there is a plan, the contents of which will be published now;







Psych! Really, The Crack Team does suggest a plan used several years ago and published on these pages. They come highly recommended. Though the Crack Team would like to add an idea that was omitted several years ago; close eyes really, really hard, and hope that when the eyes are opened the problem will have gone away.

After that Landru offered another edict concerning the following year, "Those that think that they can arrive at 8:15 AM and leave at 2:35 PM, those days are over!" The exclamation is added to simulate the tenseness in the jaw as these words were spoken.

But those not of the body were reassured, there was something they could do to continue "those days" that were supposedly over, "You can use the Open Market and leave," they were told with the same tenseness in the jaw.

On a happier note, those not of the body were reminded that there will be only happy, condescending, patronizing talk in the future with all students no matter if they tell you go fuck yourself or if they throw a chair at you. Happiness is what it is all about.


1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Most of today's NYC school administrators do speak like the voice of authority from on high. In what now seems like a golden age in NYC education thirty years ago, plans for school improvement were developed and implemented by the entire school community. This 'follow me or get out stuff' has absolutly nothing to do with leadership. I guess that Walcott has always been a follower, and Bloomberg can only lead when profits, not children, are involved. .