SOUTH BRONX SCHOOL: Help Wanted At The DOE

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Help Wanted At The DOE


I came across an classified ad the other day in a newspaper whose name I have forgotten. It was an ad recruiting for principals here in NYC, put out by the DOE. I would like to share it, however scanner is on the fritz so I will type it our verbatim

Help Wanted Principals for NYC Schools

Pay: 125K

Education Requirements:

High School Graduate, preferably a prep school
College Graduate, preferably an Ivy League school


Qualifications:

Caucasian
Previous work in education is not required
Applicants must be between the ages of 26-29
Must be able to not get along with others
Applicant must have serious insecurity issues

Preferred that female applicants have major daddy issues
Preferred that male applicants have some sort of Freudian phallus issues
Chip on shoulder, preferred, but not needed
Management experience not required
Applicant will be disqualified if in past has been a manager in a fast food restaurant due to being overqualified

Ability not to be able to think for yourself
The applicant must be able to take reality and turn it into fiction
The applicant must have three recommendations that he/she can be verbally abusive

The applicant must show an ability to blame others for his/her own foibles

Those applicants showing an ability in the past to destroy a business will get preferred consideration

The applicant must have an self absorbed sense of self

The applicant must think that they alone can help children of color
The applicant must not have a life
The applicant must be know at all times he/she is above any laws and Chancellor Regs


If you feel you meet these criteria please call HR Connect at 718 935 4000. Come be part of the award winnning NYC DOE where you can think you are making a difference. Because in your own mind perception becomes your reality.

Wow, great to see the DOE at least being honest.

3 comments:

Chaz said...

It would be funny if it wasn't true.

Anonymous said...

Let's be straight on something Bronx Teacher. You are on thin ice. Next smart ass comment against Whitney can very well be your last. You are known, we hope you have eyes in the back of your head. You will need them. Leave Whitney alone.

Anonymous said...

Hm. I didn't see anything about Whitney Houston in this piece. Did I miss something SBS? Or does Anon need help with reading comprehension? If so, he/she MUST be an NYCDOE Principal.

LMAO.